I just realized something.

I always say that it's better to break up with a man at the first red flag and I reason that with that men rarely ever change for anyone but themselves and maybe some other men they respect so it's a waste of time to stay.

but what I realized is:

women in general don't cause the same problems to men in relationships as the other way around.

Men will do anything to get sex and other benefits. lie for years about commitment, fake genuine love, lie about what they truly want from women, manipulate you into thinking that they want the same thing as you or manipulate you into thinking you want the same thing as them.

all women has to learn basic psychology in order to avoid man-childs, parasites, abusers, narcissistics, murderers.

but how does the average woman (not in looks, as in statistics) hurt men?

I truly tried to rake my memories to see how did I upset guys I had to do anything with.

and I barely came up with anything. one time I pissed off my fuckbuddy (aka I wanted a relationship but agreed to a FWB bc he lied about seeing if he wants a relationship with me) by being 20 minutes late to our meeting. another time I pissed off an one night stand when I asked for oral after I gave him head. Almost every time I hinted/told to my ex boyfriend that I wasn't as happy as I was in the beginning of our relationship and that I wanted to improve things to keep it he would become cold and distant instead of trying to do something.

I feel like the average woman usually pisses off men in insignificant ways.

refusing sex, refusing unreturned emotional labor, getting rightfully hysterical bc of his gaslighting. but the average woman rarely is ever out there trying to hurt men. they simply set boundaries and men are threatened by that bc those boundaries get in their ways.

honestly the most common way women try to hurt men is trying to get their money. destroying men's reputation is not even working bc of how apologetic society is towards men. literal r4pists have been forgiven despite confessing to the crime.

but the average woman is NOT those women who are after men's money aka gold diggers. the average woman is simply not socialized to be gold diggers they rarely have the heart to demand dinner dates and sooooo many women will be huge pickmes and go 50/50 on everything.

and no women demanding men to pay dates is not gold digging bc that's the most sufficient way to filter out liers who only want to pump and dump you. Men who pump and dump must do it as cheaply as possible and that excludes dinner dates. bc if men see that they have to invest money and time in you in order to get sex then they are more likely to leave you and find a pickme who is willing to have sex on the first date in the McDonald's parking lot.

women rarely ever leave loving and caring men. women almost always leave men when they can't bear their toxicity or abuse anymore.

while men will actively gaslight you about everything in order to keep the sex and other benefits even when they don't love you or even when they hate you.

also most men see sex as a means of masturbation, even in long term relationships, and not as a way to connect with someone. that is why never have sex without a condom bc men will do anything to get satisfying orgams since masturbation is not working for them anymore. they will sleep with anyone regardless of stds even fatal ones. also even if you don't worry about stds bc you use condoms, what SANE women would want to be used as a living fleshlight??? also so many women in longterm relationships get stds from their cheating men. also sperm is actually harmful for women like the most common way is that it causes yeast infection, I had been there for fucking gods sake.

Men: no our relationship is not as bad you are overreacting and your friends are jealous. yes I will marry you when the time feels right or I get extra money, but the new gaming consol is coming out soon sooo..... what do you mean you are unhappy we have plenty of sex and food at home what do you mean you want to go out?? what do you mean we never talk we are talking right now? yes babe I promise I don't watch porn. Babe me watching porn doesn't mean that I want to do the same violent things to you or that I don't find you attractive bc you don't look like the models at all. Babe no you are wrong porn didn't kill my libido and attraction to you. no babe I'm not with you only bc I didn't get anyone better at the moment.

the fact that women rarely ever go into relationships with lies and the fact that men usually get into relationships by lying/manipulating and keep those relationships with gaslighting are the reasons WHY you need to drop a man at the FIRST red flag.

NO GENUINE MAN WOULD LIE, MANIPULATE OR GASLIGHT YOU NOT EVEN ONCE.

as a woman myself I never felt the urge to actually hurt any men especially not for years especially not by lying about loving them. the only time I ever wanted to yell at men, which is still not significantly hurting, was when I'm faced with their cruelty. but that's still confrontation and is NOT manipulating or lying or gaslighting for YEARS.

and if you notice that something is just off then that means the man fucked up and you almost saw through his lies. TRUST YOUR GUT.

that is the simple truth.