i can't help but think that over the course of the last one and half years i have deteriorated as a person in every aspect. i look even more shitty (no matter how much i try to take care of myself), i feel extremely anxious and miserable, i'm completely alone and don't socialize at all, and i can't even do trivial things bc i feel like i legit became stupider. school-wise, i decided to switch majors and now am struggling to get through the whole "bureaucracy side" of it on time. i can't hold convos with ppl anymore and just stay at home all the time. i gave up thinking abt my platonic/romantic prospects, they seem impossible. i make stupid decisions which i later literally want to kms for. it feels like the universe is completely against me. i had an easier grip on things before than i do now and it saddens me greatly.
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I thought about going back to uni but then I was like wait what? I'll be paying nearly 10K a year just to stay at home all day and be taught online? Wtf. No. Rip-off.
I don't think you're alone though, OP. Just look at the statistics for alcohol consumption for the past year. It has sky-rocketed. Everyone's mental health is in the shitter and I'm worried about what affects this will have in the near-future.
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I'm sorry OP you are going through this. not to sound ignorant but taking walks or exercising really helps when you feel like everything is wrong.
as you said it's anxiety and anxiety makes you feel like you are constantly in a "fight of flight" situation and when you feel like that it's really easy to make bad decisions and feel stupid.
you are not actually stupid your brain is just occupied with trying to find ways to survive.
try reassuring yourself and center yourself in the present by making yourself aware of your surroundings by listing what you can see and hear while taking deep breaths. "I can see my desk, my lamp, my laptop in front of me, I can hear the cars, the tram, the people outside of my window", etc.
also exercising or taking a walk helps bc burning off some energy helps with anxiety and it also makes you aware that you are in your body and the world is not dying around you.
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being *IN quarantine/online school i can't even spell right
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